I thought of you Saturday morning when I woke up. I thought of you as your big brother asked about you and if you were still in my tummy. I cried as I reminded him that you were in Heaven watching over us. I thought of you that evening as I saw the 2 very pregnant girls walk up. I cried as your daddy was asking if I was ok because I wasn't....I'm not. I thought of you as the beautiful fireworks lit up the sky. I smiled as I thought about how you were probably watching them too, but had a much better seat!
It's not fair that I have to miss you instead of hold you in my arms. It's not fair that I have to look at pictures to see your sweet face, hands & feet. I did everything I could to make my body a safe and healthy place for you until you were ready to come into the world. I stayed active, I cut out caffeine, and tried not to eat too many sweets; I took my vitamins and drank lots of water. It's not fair that these women who drink alcohol and smoke their whole pregnancy give birth to healthy, breathing babies that they get to cuddle and spoil. It's not fair that Davin doesn't get to teach you how to count, or your ABC's, or make you laugh. He didn't even get to hold you. It's not fair that you can't be here with me, your daddy, and your big brother. IT'S JUST NOT FAIR!
I'm so sorry. HUGS!
ReplyDeleteStill saying many prayers for you guys! No it's not fair!! No family should even have to go through this!
ReplyDeleteThese days are rough, and you are right, it is not fair that we had to go without our precious babies. You are not alone, please remember that. Standing with you and praying for you as you grieve the loss of your angel.
ReplyDeleteAw Jess...you brought a tear to my eye. I know we don't talk much, but my heart aches for your grief and despair. ((hugs))
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