Today Dayton would have been 4 months old. All day I've been thinking of the things that I should have gotten to see him do. I could go on and on about what I wish I could have experienced with Dayton, because I wanted to see and be there for it all! I do know that he would have looked a lot like his older brother Davin! This is Dayton on the left and his big brother Davin on the right.....
I went to the cemetery this morning and took Dayton a small balloon. It was peaceful and quiet out there so I just sat, talked, and cried for a little bit. It was nice. It was the first time I had gone out there by myself. With his grave site being a little over an hour away from where I live I don't get to make it up there too often. But, I was off work today and with it being the 11th, which means another month has passed, I felt I needed to go today.
These past 4 months have been hard. There have been lots of bad days, sadness, tears, anger and confusion. But I do have good days too. My oldest son Davin helps me to have good days!
He loves donuts!
And Saturday we had a Mommy/Davin movie date and saw Madagascar 3!
My boys mean the world to me. I love them both so much. I wish Dayton was here to get to have fun days with me and Davin, but I'm sure he's watching over us and is glad to see his Mommy and big brother have good days to off set some of the bad/tougher days!
It seems a little hard for me to believe it's been 4 months already, of course I keep forgetting it's June. I'm glad you got to go out to see him today and spend a little quiet time. I miss that, A LOT! We typically find baby spots to visit when we move but haven't since we've been here. I need to do that. You are such a strong woman. I know sometimes it may not feel like you are or you may not even want to be sometimes but you are. You are an inspiration to other BLMs.
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